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Booty Jokes

What do you get when cross a donkey and an onion? A piece of ass that’ll bring a tear to your eye!

I only trust people who like big butts……They cannot lie.

What was the movie “Superbad” originally about? A heart-warming tale about Kim Kardashian’s ass!

How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck? When you pull her pants down her ass is still in them

What do you call an artist with a brown finger? Piccassole

According to Apple what is the leading cause of iphones overheating? Downloading images of Jen Selter’s booty!

If you had a donkey and I had a chicken and if your donkey ate my chicken what will you have? Three feet of my cock up your ass.

What Do You Take When Your Butt Hurts? Assprin

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend? Wiped his ass.

What is the definition of Confidence? When your wife catches you in bed with another woman and you slap her on the ass and say, “You’re next Baby… !”

What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Slap her on the ass and tell her to get back to work.

Why did Little Ms Mufffet push Humpty Dumpty off the wall? Because she wanted to see his crack!

Did you hear about the plastic surgeon who totally removed a woman’s buttocks? It was a Disass-ter.

What do you get when you combine samarium, argon, tellurium, asenic, and sulfur? SmArTe AsS.

What do you call a couple of nuns and a blonde? Two tight ends and a wide receiver.

There was a book called Sliding Down the Banister, By Major Arssore (Made-Your-Ars-Sore)

What Mary J Blige song does Nicki Minaj like to cover? Take Me Ass I am.

Did you hear about Nicki Minaj? She won a booty pageant.

What’s the last thing to go through a bug’s mind as it hits the windshield? His ass.

Mom: If a boy touches your boobs say “don’t” and if he touches your butt say “stop”? Girl: But mom, he touched both so I said “don’t stop”

Wanna hear a joke that will make you laugh your ass off? Oh wait I see you already heard it.

Jen Selter’s ass is so big, when she were born, the doctor said “Congratulations! Twins!”

Yo mama so ugly she has the booty of a stripper and the face of a trucker.

 

Roses are Red, Foxes are clever, I like your butt, Let Me Touch It Forever

I love you with all my butt, I would say heart but my butt is bigger.

 

A boss is like a babies diaper always on your ass and always filled with sh*t

Whoever invented yoga pants deserves a medal.

 

When a man impales you through the ass, it hurts like hell, when a woman impales you through the ass, its emasculation If you didn’t want me to stare at your booty, you shouldn’t have worn yoga pants.

 

I heard the Kardashians are booty-ful.

 

Yo mama’s ass is so hairy they have it on a sign at Yellowstone saying “Don’t feed the bears”

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