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Top 50 Dirty Pick Up Lines

My dick just died, can I bury it in your vagina?

 

Did you sit in a pile of sugar? Cause you have a pretty sweet ass!

 

Hi, i’m a burgular… and I’m gonna smash your back door in!

 

You can call me “The Fireman”….mainly because I turn the hoes on!

 

I’m a zombie, can I eat you out?

 

I wish you were soap so I could feel you all over me.

 

I’m a businessman. I work in orifices, got any openings?

 

“Wanna go on an ate with me? I’ll give you the D later.”

 

I heard you got a boyfriend, but girl don’t try & pretend, like you don’t want this dick all the way in.

 

I may not go down in history, but I’ll go down on you.

 

Girl, you should sell hotdogs, because you already know how to make a weiner stand.

 

Hello, I’m bisexual. I’d like to BUY you a drink…and then get sexual

 

Hey do you have an inhaler? Cause you got that ass ma!

 

I’m going to have sex with you later, so you might as well be there!

 

They’re called “eyebrows” cus my eyes are browsin your fine ass

 

Babe, are you an elevator? Because i want to go down on you.

 

Roses or daises? Now I know what flowers to put on your casket when I murder that pussy.

 

“If you were a washing machine, I would put my dirty load inside you.”

 

I heard your grades are bad…..I’m sure this D won’t hurt.

 

Is your name Tanya? Cuz I’m gonna tan ya ass.

 

You run track?, cause I heard you relay want this dick.

 

Are you a racehorse? Cause when I ride you’ll always finish first.

 

Are u a flight attendant? Coz u gonna be plane wth this dick soon.

 

The last woman I was with said, “Kiss me where it stinks.” So, I drove her to New Jersey.

 

I heard you like Magic, well bend over and watch my dick disappear

 

Your so hot I’d jack your dad off just to see where you came from.

 

I blame your perfect breasts for my inability to focus during our conversations.

 

Can I park my car in your garage? It’s pretty big, but it doesn’t leak.

 

Do you like Adele? Cause I can tell you wanna be rolling in the D.

 

Do you like to draw? (yeah why?) Cause I put the D in Raw

 

Has any one ever told you your ass looks like a phone cause I want to hit the pound button all day long.
I have a tongue like an anteater; want to go to the zoo?

 

What do you call a penguin with a large penis? An icebreaker.

 

I know you haven’t been studying, You must want the “D”

 

Baby your bone structure is giving my “bone” structure.

 

Do you like tapes and CDs? (I guess) Good, ’cause Imma tape this dick to your forehead so you CDs nuts

 

I’m not a dick in real life, but I’ll play one in your vagina tonight!

 

Your ass is pretty tight, want me to loosen it up?

 

I’m like Domino’s Pizza. If I don’t cum in 30 minutes, the next one is free.

 

Does your pussy smell like fish because I like sushi

 

Looks don’t matter, I’ll just wrap you in a flag and fuck you for glory.

 

Do you like cherries? If not can I have yours?

 

I’d treat you like a snow storm. Give you six to eight inches and make it mildly inconvenient for you to move in the morning.

 

I hope you have a sewing machine, cause im gonna tear dat ass up

 

Are you an architect?, cause I want you on staff for my next erection.

 

I hope your a plumber, cause you got my pipe leaking.

 

Yeah. I’m an asshole, but will that stop me from getting in yours?

 

I hope your a plumber, cause you got my pipe leaking.

 

I think my allergies are acting up. Cuz everytime your around my dick swells up.

 

Wanna see my third leg?

 

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